I Read a Self-Help Book and Now I'm Ready to Host My Own Talk Show

Life has a funny way of just smacking you in the face when you least expect it. Little things pile up, which turn into big things. Big things result into needing big feelings to get through them. 

For me, and this shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone, I don't deal well with stress. I mean really, who does? I just know that my brain is already all over the place enough. I don't need help when adding to the chaos that is my day to day, but life doesn't care if you're not ready for changes, stress, and worry. When the stress packs on, I try to grasp at anything that makes me feel more "in control" and let's be honest, it doesn't work. It makes things WORSE. As I get older, I realize I am a control freak of sorts and I definitely do not like anyone or anything controlling what I do.  There's just no way to control everything around you and this is a hard pill for me to swallow. 

Lately, there have been many situations in my life that are just beyond my control that have left me feeling helpless and inadequate. I'll spare you the details, but it's not a fun feeling.  I'm sure you can relate in one way or another. 

I decided to start reading again, which is a hobby that many of you already do on a daily basis. However, I gave up the love of reading back as an eighteen-year-old college kid trying to maneuver through textbooks about topics that I couldn't care less about. When reading was forced and no longer fun, I gave up on it. Even now in graduate school, I struggle with the required readings asked of us because I find it almost torturous to read through journal articles and research that were written in 1992. 

To start this reading journey of mine, I picked a simple self-help book that I am running out of time to read. It's called 101 Secrets for Your Twenties by Paul Angone. I've had this book for awhile and I have picked it up a time or two, but my attention span is that of a goldfish. I never get more than three pages into something before I start doing something else. (This is why it takes me weeks or sometimes MONTHS to get through these popular TV shows that people tend to binge.😅)  

Surprise! I made it to page 65 and secret number 29 before I had to stop and write this. This page spoke VOLUMES to me because I feel like it sums up life for me at the moment and can apply to anyone of any age. 



Secret # 29 

DO NOT CONFUSE YOUR SETBACKS FOR SETTLING

"Too many twentysomethings are miserable because we've confused setbacks for settling. That just because we moved back in with our parents or took that job answering phones, we're failures. 

Sure maybe for the moment we've joined forces with a not-so-bragable-life. maybe we aren't going to be featured in an article in our alumni magazine anytime soon. 

But we're not settling. We're visiting. This is a season, a stage, the perfect place in time for us to prepare to take the next needed step. You can settle for a season without settling.

You settle when you completely give up, when you let your dreams be suffocated by your currently reality.  

Visiting is simply a pit stop, and even though it might feel like the pits, don't let it stop you."

(Angone, 2013, p. 65)


Damn it, Paul. how did you know I needed that? Read it one hundred times if you need to. I know I will continue to do so in the future.

But we're not settling. We're visiting. 

It's easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of life. I'm just as guilty as anyone of doing that lately. It's hard to see past the right now, especially when it isn't going the way you want it or plan for it to. 

I'll leave you with one more quote. Not from Paul, although I highly recommend his book linked here for as little as $6.68 on Amazon! 

One of my greatest friends, Kenzie, has been my sounding board recently. When I just feel like venting, being pissed off, crying, or celebrating, I always call or message her. Recently, she gave me a little piece of advice that I believe her mom passed on to her and boy did it STICK with me!

"Remember, it's a time in your life; not your lifetime."

Take your pit stop and just visit. Don't relocate and live there. Just think of it as a shitty vacation, one that you would rate as a 2/10 on TripAdvisor. 

I'll be constantly reminding myself of the same thing! 😉 

I hope this helped you reading it as much as it helped me writing it!

-Tay 


Comments

  1. UnknownMay 6, 2021 at 7:07 PM

    Love this Tay! Very insightful. And love you!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. UnknownMay 7, 2021 at 3:01 PM

      So glad you enjoyed! The book is awesome! Love you, too!!

      Delete

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